Do You Know How To Touch A Girl?

Do you know how to touch a girl?
If you want me so much
First I have to know
Are you thoughtful and kind?
Do you care what's on my mind?

-Jojo

Maria read me a few short selections from her prayer journal this evening and when we were about to get off of the phone I thanked her for it. It really helped me to respect her that much more as a woman of God and as my sister in Christ. I expressed how I felt like I didn't deserve for God to bring her into my life and that I want that much more to help her grow in holiness and draw closer to Him. I wasn't just saying that to sweet talk her; I really meant it from the depths of my heart.

At first there was silence, and a sniffle. "Thanks for sharing that with me. You're the type of guy that I've always wanted."

Everytime I talk with her we draw closer to each other. Tonight she shared with me about her 'friend' Phil and her four years of liking him and how that affected her. She told me a story from last night where she was talking to a guy she knew after Mass, a family she knew came up and assumed they were dating and asked them to go out to dinner last night. She accepted, and the guy ended up asking her out to dinner the next night in front of the family. She said yes because she didn't want things to get wierd last night, and later told him no when he dropped her off that night because it wouldn't be appropriate since her and I are seeing each other.

She had sent me a text message last night to let me know that she was Salsa dancing and that she wished I was there to dance with her. Salsa dancing is my thing, and I love it. I had been thinking about wanting to go with her just earlier on Saturday and when I heard about her going I ended up feeling quite jealous and having to work through those feelings last night and today. I didn't want to feel that way because I want her to be able to enjoy living her life and I really didn't want to share how I felt with her because I thought I was being stupid. She encouraged me to share how I felt with her and I eventually did. I'm very glad I did, it just brought us that much closer together.

Later on we talked about how we both are the type of people who will quickly give up ourselves and who we are for someone else. I've given up all my interestes in past relationships, and it never ends well. We'll be praying hard that we can keep from doing that. I really want her to keep being Maria and she really wants me to keep being Jonathan. Loving each other by allowing each of us to be free to be ourselves is so much better than trying to grasp at the other person and slowly choking the life out of them.

We also pray every night before we get off of the phone together, and each day we have a special intention that we both pray for and offer up all of our day for. God's really blessed us with each other, there's nothing I've ever done to deserve her.

She's very special to me and we are headed down the right road so far. I hope and PRAY that it continues.